Baby Girl I love you so much already ☀️🌸🦋
This is so hard for me to share but if I can help someone else, then all the yassss.
I have hidden my self-harm scars under watches, bracelets, mala beads, you name it since I was 16 years old. I have seen people eyes wander to my wrist and wonder, but never ask. I have made up stories just to skip over the story. I remember thinking recently, how am I going to explain these two little scars to Cole and my future daughter? l I so wanted to email Jessica Merrill back and say “can you please edit my scars?”. But then realized Ryan, my family + friends love and accept me for who I am. Scars and all. A lot of them know how I went through an eating disorder in highschool but made it through. My kids will know that their mommy was struggling and that they will always have me to love and support them through a n y t h i n g. They will know that I am there for them and that I’ll n e v e r ever give up. People might just see ugly scars, I see beauty. They might see a huge mistake, I see a lesson learned. They may see shame, I see strength, I love my scars for that reason.
I have realized I can trust myself.
I can trust my body through this pregnancy.
I’ve survived so much
and I will survive whatever is coming next in my life.